How do you deal with flakey friends?

Well, I had a couple flaky friends over the past four years...one smoked pot ALL the time and never came to visit me...I had to visit her if we were to be friends at all. Another friend drank all the time and ditched me at parties to hang out with guys she met. I felt left out for the longest time so tried to create space between the "friends" and myself. I thought that absence might make their hearts grow fonder, but it did nothing. The problem is that I was too willing to give and be generous and they did not have that much of an invested interest in being my friend...they "appreciated" me but it was not worth being reciprocal in the friendship. So I made the tough as nails decision to completely drop both of these girls as friends...but not before telling them kindly and quietly how I was feeling about their treatment of me. They apologized but then went back to being MIA when I was rear ended by a car (not my fault but traumatizing to me and my car!), when I was alone for the holidays, etc. I then learned that they were flakes and that they were doing me no good even during the times they were nice and fun to hang out with. Tell them in a letter or email how you feel but try to stay away from too much emotion...just use facts and state how you feel without getting overheated. You could say how true friendship is about givng and receiving 50/50 from the bottom of your heart...and that friends are "there for each other." But DON"T BE THE VICTIM! It sounds like you are a person with more integrity and should find other activities and new friends. I made the difficult decision to spend the holidays alone b/c it hurt more to hang on to the flaky, non-caring friends than to simply be a loner for a little bit. I bought and delivered Christmas presents to kids in the hospital...I did lots of yoga cles and looked inside myself to find inner love and peace. It hurt not to be around people..to laugh and watch movies...but hanging out with them was a false promise...b/c it was always followed up with not getting invited to a cool party or being forgotten in some way when they find new boyfriends. I know I will gradually make new friends...but I will do this by looking for new, better qualities and not giving MORE than I receive from any new people...there's truth to the saying that you really "get what you give."